on a frozen pond on the Boston Common when out of nowhere this slavering rabid dog appears and attacks one of the kids, clamping a massive jaw on his leg. Without hesitation, the other guy leaps to his friend's defense, and with one hand starts to beat the dog with his stick, while the other hand works its way into the dog's mouth and grabs its tongue. Eventually the attack forces the dog to weaken its grip and the boy essentially strangles to dog on its own tongue. It collapses on the snowy ground. A man who had witnessed the episode runs up, pad in hand and says "I'm a reporter for one of the local papers, I've got to write a story about this!"

He then begins to compose his headline: "Valiant Bruins Fan Saves Friend's Life on Common", when the kid, reading his work, interrupts and says "I'm not really a Bruins fan."

The reporter explains "I just assumed because you were playing hockey that you were a B's fan." He crumples up the sheet of paper and recommences: "Fearless Sox Fan in Heroic Back Bay Deed", when again he is interrupted. The kid says "I'm not actually a Red Sox fan either."

The by-now perplexed, and slightly irritated, reporter enquires "You don't like the Bruins, and you don't like the Sox, what team do you like?"

The boy replies "The Yankees", whereupon the writer begins his article again, this time writing "Little Bastard Kills Beloved Family Pet".