----- Original Message -----
From: Curt Buckler
To: webmaster@blohards.com
Sent: Tuesday, September 13, 2005 4:28 PM
Subject: Finally a home


I had heard the rumor about an underground group of Revolutionaries..Minutemen, if you will who ventured south from the homeland. I too would like to be included in your Order. I am sending my dues today, and hope this recent editorial will find its way to Blohards everywhere.

Passover speech 2005—Slaves No More

For 86 years we were slaves to Pharaoh, from here forth known as the Yankees. The used our nation and our players to build their Empire. We were the stepping stones they crushed to forward their cause. No matter the circumstances we could never defeat our captors.

Often we believed that this was the year to break our bondage, but in the end, some force of negative nature would always intercede to keep us from achieving our goal of victory. As the years progressed the Pharaoh would send the cruelest plagues upon us. (Please use your wine pinkies with me as I recite their names...DiMaggio, (we tried to counter this plague with his brother Dom, but he was not as strong) Mantle, Reggie, Munson, Gossage. As time went on the plagues hurt more…and middle names were permanently added to their plague monikers...Bucky “Bleeping” Dent, Aaron, who built the golden calf of NY, “stinkin” Boone, Derek, ERR (said gritting your teeth) Jeter, Roger “the traitor” Clemens and the biggest plague of all, one that hung around our necks every day, every minute, of every year, Babe Ruth-the bambino.

To counteract this curse, members of Red Sox nation tried a vast assortment of remedies. Some climbed mountains, sought the advice from Yogi’s not named Berra, tried to pull a piano from a pond, prayed to those in the afterworld to band together and free our souls, all attempts went unanswered. The Yankee fans.. notice that we are a Nation, while they are merely fans, would shout and write horribly hurtful phrases at us."1918", "86years", "You can never escape the CURSE", "Who’s your daddy?" And even with superior schools, wisdom and poets than our oppressors... Sages like Walden, Emerson, Franklin, Williams the best we could do to rebut their slings was Yankees Suck. They were the bullies kicking sand in our faces and stealing our girlfriends and we were powerless to do anything about it.

We needed the highest authority to intercede and prayed to the Almighty. He sent us the greatest of all Jews – Moses, or as we call him in New England, Epstein! Theo went to the desert of Arizona and found a Messiah named CURT. maybe not as catchy as Moses, but just as effective. Curt led the Nation through hard times, the loss of our shining symbol named Nomar, (get well soon) and a painful bloody ankle, which served as the rallying symbol, which helped a band of idiots shock the world. Word spread worldwide that miracles are still possible. When you are wandering and feel lost like there is no hope, there is.

The Boston Red Sox comeback from 0-3 down to topple the Evil Empire will be an inspiration for generations to come. It is cliché, (I don’t care) one day at a time, one inning at a time, one moment at a time, win one game at a time. Miracles can happen. At this Passover Seder as we remember our ancestors and thank G-d for leading us out of Egypt, we here in New England, and throughout the Nation, remember with fondness all those who came before us and brought us to the land of the World Series. Our grandparents, who took us to our first game, our parents who taught us how to keep score, our brothers who pulled for other teams but came to see the light, we thank you bunch of Idiots more than you will ever know. To the Pharaoh named Steinbrenner, I say it is time to Passover the torch. Our shackles are broken and we are slaves no more.


Curt Buckler April 23, 2005